KOCHI: Meticulous planning done months in advance, elaborate floral mandaps, splendid designer bridal wears, opulent jewels, sumptuous feasts... marriage, loaded with luxuries, is sure to create a permanent dent in the pocket of an average middle income family. With mounting costs and soaring price of gold, and ‘show off’ items for the nuptials, the sacred ceremony is causing heartburn for many, especially the bride’s side. So, isn’t there an ulterior option that one can adopt? A little bit of research revealed a pleasant surprise. Many youngsters these days are showing the sense and pluck to opt for modest marriages that are being held in register offices with minimum to no cost involved.Earlier, it was the lack of consent from the parent’s side that prompted registered marriages. Now there is evidently a wind of change. Interestingly, many of the young ones who are getting married in a simple way are doing so with full blessings from their parents. Vidhuraj M T, a media professional who got married about six months back says, “The total cost incurred for our marriage was `22, that I had to pay at the register office. I had long made up my mind to avoid any unwanted expense for my marriage, and fortunately both families stood by us. I have been a witness to many families who, by the mere show of ostentation, have to suffer for the rest of their lives.”Ila, an employee of Andhra Bank who got married two years ago to her college sweetheart says, “Having always been averse to unwanted expenditure, I yearned for a register marriage since my childhood. Though we held a feast for the family and friends later, our marriage function was simple sans any unreasonable lavishness.” Her husband Pradeep, an SBI employee says, “The rate of gold is constantly increasing, but that cannot prevent the parents from getting their children married. Why should one spend huge amounts for a function that is being held for a single day. The money spent for marriage is dead money. Being educated, it is high time that atleast a few people should have the courage to think and act differently.”There are many among the unmarried who vouch that there is greater charm in keeping it simple. Says Meena, an HR manager from Kochi, “The whole hullabaloo over a single day of our life sucks. I will only get married if my parents agree to have the function in a modest way. Though I have never disregarded my parent’s opinion, this time I will definitely disagree for a noble cause.”Preeti Iyer, who will be getting married next month, is a bit disconcerted seeing the amount of money going down the drain for her marriage. Her parents are spending over 15 lakhs, and most of it is on the expensive venue (star hotel) and food. But some mild pressure from her in-laws who wanted to have a rather grand wedding for their son, and her own parents' wishes to make it an affair to remember for their only daughter, prompted many of the rash decisions. Preeti says she would not have dreamt of such obscene expenditure if she were not so delighted with the match, and the good wave length she shares with her would-be. But even this hasn’t helped much in controlling expenses. “Ideally I would have liked an elegant wedding where money is spent more sensibly. But then that rarely happens in Indian weddings. Also, I feel both the groom and bride’s side should be less demanding about the event. They should see it as a coming together of two individuals who will be spending their lives together. That is what really matters. But instead the focus is on the paraphernalia. There should be a spirit of mutual corporation and team work between the in-laws. But that rarely happens," she says. Yet, it is heartening that many are beginning to see the futility of the wedding wasteland.
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