Is there someone you know who has threatened to kill themselves? How seriously should you take the issue? Is someone around you depressed, talking about hurting themselves? Do you feel helpless in such situations? There is a lot you can do, to provide support.
Here's what psychologist Arpita Anand says, "Often families and friends feel very helpless and because it's such a complex issue. They often overcrowd because the person is not willing to share or they become very dismissive or critical. The point they're missing out on is what the person is saying. There isn't any definite prescription on the ideal thing to do, simple thing is to be around the person and unconditionally support him/her."
Most importantly, please advise them to seek help. Find a trained counsellor in your area. Remember that most people who are suicidal are often depressed and may also suffer from a psychiatric condition underlying that suicidal intent.
Here are some myths and facts when it comes to suicide.
Studies show and mental health experts agree, tragically, that there is a trigger effect between media coverage of a suicide, and people attempting to kill themselves. Not in a cult follower way, just that people with suicidal tendencies are in a very delicate situation mentally, and sometimes all it takes for that final push, is to see someone else in similar circumstances who manage to end their lives.
The tragedy really is that help is out there.
"The first biggest myth is that people believe if someone is talking about suicide or talking about harming themselves, they will not do it. That's absolutely incorrect. Research indicates that most people who end up killing themselves have at some point shared with a person around them that that's a thought they have. If anyone around you makes that comment, it ought to be taken seriously,” says Anand.
Second myth:
"If a person is appearing to be ok and not depressed, then that is no reason to believe they won't do it. Some trigger, to tip off that balance," says Anand, adding that they can then go on to harm themselves
"The other thing is that sometimes people may do little things like hurting themselves or initial attempts like a cry for help. So people should try and not miss out on those signs and symptoms. If they don't respond in a supportive manner, then that may reinforce the thoughts in their head, and they may just take that drastic step,” explains Anand.
She also adds that most people who are suicidal will certainly be expressing that one way or the other, they may not say it in so many words, but indicating it with some changes in their mood.
So what should you lookout for?
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"Any changes in behaviour patterns, sleep and appetite changes, if they're withdrawn, changes in their mood, irritability and anger, not just low mood. One should be a bit more watchful of other emotional changes. Also, any comments that reflect hopelessness or helplessness,” says Anand.
Those particularly at risk may be going through a crisis, a bad patch, a relationship ending, the death of a loved one – remember that often depression is an underlying condition.
The main difference between someone thinking about killing themselves (many people who don’t go on to take that drastic step do have suicidal thoughts) and actually doing it is having a plan thought out.
"Most people who end up killing themselves do that because it is a thought out plan. So people who have a definite plan on how they're going to do it, when they're going to do it, are most likely to end their life. This also means arranging the means by which they're going to end their lives, whether it's the medicines they plan overdose on, or using things like toilet cleaners that they might overdose on or any sharp objects lying around with which they can harm themselves. So look for strange objects that are not usually a part and parcel of that person's environment,” says Anand.
The psychologist also says that friends and family can play a part in providing unconditional help. But she warns that if you're hearing "repeated negative comments, then they need professional help to learn strategies to cope".
Following are some crisis intervention helplines:
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