Researching before Convincing Your Parents
Organize your ideas. Before you begin talking with your parents about a tattoo, jot down your motivation for wanting a tattoo and why you think your parents should allow it. Writing ideas down will help you strengthen your argument. Think about and write ideas including: How long you’ve wanted a tattoo for. If you present the decision as one you’ve wrestled with for months--i.e. not an impulse--your parents will be more likely to take the choice seriously. Think of reasons you can justify getting a tattoo. Have you been very responsible the last month (or longer)? Has your behavior been decent and respectable?
Choose words or images that are parent-friendly. The content of your potential tattoo could be influential on your parents. If you want positive words like “hope,” “love,” “peace,” as a tattoo, your parents will likely be more supportive of your decision. Likewise, your parents will look on the situation more favorably if you want your tattoo to be a positive image that carries personal meaning. However, if you want to tattoo a rude or profane word on your skin, or you want a negative image tattooed, your parents might count that as a strike against you.
Choose a conservative location for the tattoo. Your parents might be more willing to allow you to get a tattoo if the placement of it is relatively unseen (yet not in an incredibly private area). Good locations include: on your shoulder, in between your shoulders, on your back, on the back of your lower legs, on your ankle, or even on the side of your abdominal area. EXPERT TIP Michelle Myles Michelle Myles Tattoo Artist & Co-owner, Daredevil Tattoo Michelle Myles is the Co-owner of Daredevil Tattoo, a tattoo shop located based in New York City's Lower East Side. Michelle has more than 20 years of tattooing experience. She also operates the Daredevil Tattoo Museum, co-owner Brad Fink's personal collection of antique tattoo memorabilia that he has amassed over the last 27 years of tattooing. Michelle Myles Michelle Myles Tattoo Artist & Co-owner, Daredevil Tattoo Expert Warning: Consider whether you might need to cover your tattoos in the future. Even though it's very trendy right now, it's not always a good idea to get tattooed on your hands or your neck. There might come a time when you might not want to have such a visible tattoo, so most artists don't recommend that.
Persuading Your Parents
Articulate why you want a tattoo. Your parents are bound to ask you what your reasons for wanting a tattoo are. Reasons such as “My tattoo will be a daily reminder to me of something that happened in my lifetime” or “I want this tattoo to be a symbol of a value I have (or am striving to get)” will show your emotional maturity and the thought you’ve put into the decision to get a tattoo. Saying something like “I just want to get one because it sounds cool” or “I want a tattoo because one of my friends got one” will not persuade your parents.
Explain that you understand tattoos are permanent. For many concerned parents, this is the biggest red flag. Tell your parents them that you definitely want the design you have chosen on your body forever. Then, present all of the information you gathered during the research phase, to address their questions before they even ask them. Tell them why you like your design so much, perhaps it is a tribute to a loved one, or an image or phrase that holds personal meaning to you. This will help them to understand why you want this permanently on your body. Try saying, “I understand that this tattoo will be on my body forever. I’m okay with that, though; the design [or words] means a lot to me, and I think it always will.”
Clarify that the tattoo should not prevent you from finding a job. Your parents may be concerned that your tattoo will cause you to have trouble getting a job. Explain to them that, in fact, many people with tattoos have no trouble finding employment. If they’re still concerned, point out that your tattoo (if it’s on your arms, legs, or torso) will be in a location that can be easily covered by clothing in a conservative work environment.
Allow your parents to contribute ideas. If your parents have input about the size, location, or subject matter of your tattoo, take that into account. Listening to your parents’ feedback and reaching a compromise (if needed) will encourage them to allow you to get the tattoo. Say something like, “What do you both think of this idea? I’d like your input or suggestions, although I’m hoping that you’ll support my idea to get this tattoo.” For example, if you really want a visible tattoo, your parents may suggest you get it somewhere that can be covered easily if there’s a time that you don’t want it to be seen.
Anticipate your parents saying “no”. If your parents are not swayed by your arguments and still disapprove of your tattoo idea, don’t become angry. Wait a few months before bringing up the topic again. Legally, minors (anyone under 18) cannot receive a tattoo without the written consent of a parent or legal guardian, so you’ll need their explicit approval. If your parents tell you “no,” say something like, “OK, that’s not the answer that I was hoping for, but I’m still glad that we had this conversation.” If you are over 18 and still want a tattoo despite your parents’ objections, you have a legal right to make that decision.
Getting the Tattoo
Offer to save up money for the tattoo. If your parents are concerned about covering the cost of your tattoo (which can become expensive quickly), assure them that you will pay the tattoo artist’s fee. This will also help convince your folks that you’re mature enough to have thought ahead about the financial cost of a tattoo. Your parents will know that you really want a tattoo if you work hard and earn money for it.
Take your parents with you to look at studios and talk to artists. Your parents will want to make sure the studio is clean and hygienic and also look at the artist’s work to make sure that they do a good job and can create good looking tattoos. Make sure that the work the tattoo artist has done is well done, and that they are experienced and professional. Your parents will likely want to review the work that artist has done, to assure that they know what they are doing.
Investigate the shop’s sanitary practices. Your parents will want to know about the tattoo parlor’s sanitary practices. Call the shop, or email if an address is given. Ask what steps the artists take to clean their tools and dispose of used needles. Your parents would be right to be concerned about this issue. If the tattoo artists do not properly clean their tools, or if they re-use tattoo needles, you could be at risk for serious illness.
Let your parents come with when you get your tattoo done. They can be good for moral support. It will also make your folks feel more comfortable about you getting the tattoo if they can be in the room with you while it’s happening. If you need their legal consent you may need your parents with you anyway.
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