How to Create a Safe Space for When You’re Feeling Low

Creating Your Safe Place

Imagine a place that you have always felt comfortable in. Perhaps it is your grandmother's cottage or the tent you slept in during a fun trip with your friends. It might even be as simple as your bedroom. The place doesn’t have to have a name. What if it was that little cave you spotted and explored while climbing a mountain? Consider deeply where you'd like your safe space to be, and what images and memories help you feel calm and centered. If you struggle to find your place, carry a notebook and pencil with you and take note of every little thing you like about a memorable (or newly found) place. Soon enough, you’ll look back at your notes and think, “Hey! I’ve found my safe place!”

Imagine the space and ambiance as clearly as possible. Think about every little detail using each of your senses: sight, sound, smell, taste, and touch. Doing so will help cool you down while you gradually take your focus off what made you angry, diverting your attention to all these specific and calming details. Mentally play with your safe space. Perhaps you turn the finished building into night-time by imagining a full moon is out and there are billions of twinkling stars dancing unencumbered by city lights.

Visualize a thousand candles lighting up the area. The candles can be anywhere– on a shelf, on the grass, or even just floating in the air! If you are more of a realist, imagine that the candles cannot burn anything. They are only there to bring light and warmth.

Thank yourself for fleshing out your safe place. You have done it! The next time you feel out of sorts, simply envision your safe space and focus on the feelings it brings you. Practice dissolving everything else in your mind and concentrating solely on that special feeling your safe place brings you.

Using Your Safe Place

Recognise the situation in which you get angry. This is very important, as it lets you identify and understand when you should be mentally ready to visualize. The best thing to do is to ignore the people who are annoying you. However, sometimes that’s not so easy, and that’s why this article is here.

Taking several deep breaths will help calm you down. Being calm is key to being able to visualize vividly in your mind's eye.

Close your eyes, then start imagining the sensations of your place. Use all your five senses like you did before. Try to zone out, without letting it show.

Continue adding detail. This is where you build out your safe place and deepen the channels of thought by exploring every side of it. Then, work to slowly build these details into your mental picture. After you’ve finished your construct, focus on the pleasant feeling it gives you. Keep a hold of that feeling by consciously fixing your entire self upon it. To learn how to focus on a single feeling, train your brain by doing various focus exercises which you can find on the internet. Specifically, concentrate intensely on specific sensations and details. With time, you will be able to visualize your haven more intensely and with less difficulty. When you’re done, stay in your safe place for a few seconds or minutes, (depending on how stressed or angry you are), then inhale and exhale deeply. After that, exit your place, keeping that safe feeling with you. The control over how and when you picture your safe place can also help establish a feeling of control in the real world.