It must be someone’s birthday today and for most of those who turn a year older it will be a happy occasion. But for some, they dread their special day of the year. But why? It’s because of experiencing anxiety or depression, more commonly known as the ‘birthday blues’.
But what causes birthday anxiety or sadness? Let’s explore
Debra Kissen, PhD, clinical director of Light on Anxiety, told Refinery29 that “it’s normal to feel anxious or depressed on your birthday, even though it’s supposed to be a time for celebration”. According to her, a birthday can even be a ‘set up for dissapointment.’
“Anytime you’re supposed to be happy, and supposed to be shown love, and supposed to have connections to people who are thinking of you is a setup for disappointment,” she told Refinery29.
According to Kissen, there is also pressure to have a ‘lit’ birthday celebration even if for many parties may not be their idea of fun, if they are introverted or suffer from social anxiety. “Having everyone singing at you or looking at you may be a nightmare, even for individuals who don’t like attention,” she explains. Simply going through your phone contacts and attempting to find enough people to invite to a good party may be agonising.
There can also be a situation if a person does not have adequate friends or family, which is especially prevalent among the elderly, who frequently spend their birthdays alone. One research of people aged 75 and up discovered that the rate of self-inflicted deaths increased in the 30 days before and following a birthday, according to a report by Science of People.
A birthday may also bring in the feelings of a midlife crisis, which might cause you to reconsider your identity and priorities. Whilst many people consider this to be largely a masculine issue, a woman’s midlife crisis is just as genuine, if less publicised, explains a report by Choosing Therapy.
It Also Brings Us Closer to the Idea of our Mortality
Birthdays are also a physical way of measuring the passage of time, which might elicit negative emotions, says the report by Refinery 29. Kissen explains that on one’s birthday, they may realise how ephemeral life is, which can be hard.
According to Healthline, this is a valid concern held by many people. According to one study, those who have a history of high blood pressure are more likely to have a stroke or heart attack on their birthday. The report also describes a woman who got anxiety symptoms around her 75th birthday, owing to the fact that her mother died at the age of 75.
So, How Does One Deal With It?
There are countless ways prescribed for one to deal with their birthday blues. First, is to acknowledge that the expectations set around a birthday can be defined according to your own life and rules.
The report by Choosing Therapy also recommends that rather than dwelling on things that did not go as planned, one should ask themselves new questions. “What obstacles did I face and successfully overcome? What life lesson have you learned in the last year? Did you meet new folks or strengthen old ones? What new things did you discover about yourself that made you happy? The replies may reveal accomplishments you previously overlooked, the report says.
One should also try to consider combating their ideas around age. Ageing can be a happy experience once it is realised that no one can escape it and it is a natural process. One should try to accept change and take steps to ensure their physical, emotional, cognitive, spiritual, and social needs are being met.
One should also celebrate their birthday in a way they like to, and it doesn’t have to be a party. One should consider what provides them delight and give themselves something special. One should also plan ahead to create a day of meaningful activities which will help you feel good about yourself and foster sentiments of self-worth and self-compassion.
Read all the Latest Explainers here
Comments
0 comment